Single? Taken? No matter what your relationship status is in quarantine, your sex life is probably in need of some S.O.S. Here’s how to take a drab sex life and make it fab.
By Leslie K. Hughes
If your sex life over the past year has dropped the sex and become just life, then you are in need of some help. A healthy sex life is absolutely necessary to keep your sanity, whether you’re in a relationship or not. You don’t need another person to turn the heat up in bed, but you definitely need something to get that carnal fire going.
I’ll give you a bit of a pass since the whole global pandemic thing did shake up our lives, but now it’s time to shake up your “new normal” life, get back on the proverbial horse and start riding.
Here’s how.
If you’re single . . .
Learn to re-love yourself
If there’s one thing this pandemic has done for us, it’s forced us to get up close and personal with ourselves. Without the people and the activities to distract, we’ve seen the good, the bad, and the ugly of ourselves. But have you gotten up close and personal with your sexy side? If you’re flying solo then this is the perfect opportunity to show yourself some love in the sack.
When you’re stuck at home, there is no better time to get more in touch with yourself (literally) and see what turns you on. Keep it natural or throw some toys in the mix — go with whatever you’re feeling.
Try new porn
Many people are in the habit of searching for the same things when they go to watch porn. No shame in that — you know what you like and there’s something to be said about that. However, step outside of your comfort zone and roll the dice on trying something new that may become your new go-to.
Also, if you want to move your porn experience past the visual, try audio porn. This is a great alternative to visual stimulation and is our favorite way to introduce a new human sense (sound) to your sex life.
Get dressed up . . . for yourself
Turn yourself on with yourself. Put something on that makes you feel sexy (yes guys, you can do this, too). Throw on some sexy music and snap some photos. They don’t need to be for anyone; they can serve as a reminder to yourself of how hot and confident you can be.
If you’re coupled up . . .
Set the mood
You may have been better about this when you first started dating, but quarantine likely changed that. Three months in a covid relationship translates to 1 year in a regular relationship, so chances are good that setting the mood for sex has died along with your libido.
Luckily, it’s easy to bring this back into the bedroom to make your sex life more intentional. Our favorites to get the bedroom vibe going are dimmed lights, some good music and some sexy fun in the form of this massage candle from Woo More Play.
Don’t rely just on sex
A great sex life goes beyond just the act of sex. There is much more that creates the experience that may have gotten lost in quarantine. The motto on our campaign for better sex is: Bring Back Foreplay. The lead-up to actual sex can really make or break the experience.
Get creative with this. Try blindfolds, try new forms of touching (flashback to that feather scene in 40 Days and 40 Nights), incorporate oils, scents, and more.
Make a sexlist
Are there things you want to try in bed that you’ve never done before? Likely your partner has some, too. Make a sexlist together of things you’re both wanting to try, and are comfortable doing.
We love this as a healthy way to communicate fantasies and bring them to life in a safe space.
NSFW at home
Since you’re both working from home, take advantage of the potential for a lunchtime quickie or an extra long lunch, depending on what you’re feeling that day.
We also love the idea of sending pics back and forth safely without worrying about your boss seeing them.
Role play
Quarantine has sped up relationships for many, and lots of couples are getting to know each other more quickly and deeply (for better or for worse) than expected.
There may be sides of you that your partner isn’t crazy about, so we suggest instead focusing on tapping into a whole new side of you that your partner is sure to love, via role play. Dress the part to play out each others’ fantasies, and watch your sex life rise from the ashes.
Take a trip to toyland
Give a whole new meaning to Babes in Toyland when you and your partner do some online shopping for toys to bring into the mix. Toys are a safe way to experiment a little bit and tickle your partner’s fancy in a whole new way.
Play dressup
If you’re like the rest of us, your closet has a lot more sweatpants and sweatshirts in it than it did pre-quarantine. Though I am all about wearing your cozies, it’s nice to sometimes put on the outfit that makes you feel sexiest and have a night with your partner. The confidence you’ll exude from rocking this sexy outfit will have your person begging for you.
